Hoo Boy!

I went out to Subway for lunch. Pickin's are slim down in Renton at lunch hour. In front of me in line was a very strange couple. The man was a big silly-muscled man. Silly-muscled just meaning he had more muscles in his arms than are necessary, or apparently, practical. His arms were so silly-big that they sort of stuck out from his body at an odd angle. The mean bitchy little voice in me REALLY wanted to pick a fight with him and ask him if he was even capable of putting his arms down to his sides. He was wearing a giant silver buckle belt, a big black cowboy hat, a black t-shirt with the sleeves rolled up, a pair of pointy black cowboy boots, and tight black jeans. He looked like a cowboy wannabe - not quite real enough to be a cowboy, but someone who wanted to project the image of manliness using the stereotype of a cowboy. But what really helped get me thinking of a cowboy was his girlfriend. She was a short, mildly round woman with pink skin and an unfortunately up-turned nose. You can already see where I'm going with this, can't you? She was wearing these little black boots with high heels that made her feet look extra short and small and... hoof-like. And she squealed (like a pig) when her cowboyfriend poked her in the sides. They were quite a pair - the farmhand and his little piggy.

I know, it's incredibly mean and judgemental of me, but I'm a mean and judgemental person when it comes to certain types of people. I have zer0 tolerance for cowboys, macho men, spurious logic, republicans, Ohio, certain types of "christians," and bad drivers. It's ok, though. Ohio doesn't like me either.