So in the last few weeks I have been away on vacation, Amtraking across the country. It has only been three weeks, but I have to tell you that my life has been completely changed - taken, turned upside down, and shaken - in the last three weeks like never before. I hope that some of you are still reading - I know I've been gone for a while. And although these next few entries are going to be doozies I encourage you to stick with me here because it will explain the massive changes that are to come.

January 1st, 4PM The Boy dropped me off at the Amtrak station downtown after I nearly drove him mad with my last minute packing panicks. You may be wondering why Amtrak? Why spend three weeks taking a bloody train all over the place when you can just fly? Why the midwest and not Hawaii - and in January no less?! Well, I can hear the train whistles from my house very clearly in the winter (they're going right now as a matter of fact) and they always make me feel a little lonely. It seems like I notice them the most after a night of meaningless grope-fest with some boy my heart isn't totally into (or girl on one occasion). And after listening to the whistles for the last 5 winters, I decided that it was time to ride the trains with the lonesome whistles. Also, Amtrak could go belly-up at any time, and I sure as hell didn't want to miss my opportunity to travel the country by rail. As for the midwest thing, well, I was also a bit short on cash, so I wanted to stay with friends and taking the train all the way to the East Coast would take too long... hence the midwest. In January. The January part is because I was hired on February 1st two years ago and so I have to use up a certain amount of vacation by that date. So there's the why where when part. Or at least part of it. I also ended up visiting two relatives homes, two old flames, the two cities I almost moved to instead of Seattle, and visited with two small children. It was some sort of spiritual, symbolic journey for me, I guess. Anyway, on with the details.

The first night was pretty boring. I met some boy who wanted to score my phone number. He was from Wenatchee and is younger than my little brother, but whatever. He says he takes the train into Seattle a lot and he wants to get coffee with me as long as my "man" wouldn't "be uncool with that, you know what I mean?" Right.

Day Two: Montana. We were in Montana pretty much all day. I saw real tumbleweed like in the movies! It tumbled! There were a lot of Native Americans and Amish people on the train. Interesting demographics, really. The Amish folks made me think of our own dear amishboy of course. I was a bit shocked by the Cheetos and other uncharacteristic foods that they carried with them. Somehow, I always imagine the Amish as people who would eat organic food and stuff, but then I remember how the Amish folks near where I went to college used to have big vats of pesticides strapped on their horse-drawn farm equipment. It kind of bugs me. But then again, they're Amish not hippies, after all. Another surprise in Day Two is that Montana is only mountainous in the western 1/5th of the state. The rest of it is flat as a pancake - and as brown as one in the winter.

Day Three: I met a woman who was studying for her cosmetology/manicure exam. She wanted me to help study. I learned about all kinds of gross diseases you can get on your skin and nails. And there were pictures too. You don't want to know.

Also, I finally made it to Ann Arbor! My mom's cousin, Phillip, picked me up at the station. I stayed at his house while I was there. I spent some good, quality time with him and his family. Phillip was the cool "uncle" in our family (though he's technically my second-cousin or some such nonsense - whatever he is, it's a close relationship where my mom's side of the family is concerned). He's the one who got us booze when we were kids, the one who would let us stay up when he babysat us, the one who would play games with us when the other adults wanted us to hush up or act adult. He's also the most successful family member. He taught at Harvard and Duke for a bit and is now at UMich. And he's been interviewed on CNN and stuff over some of his research. Anyway, I didn't really know his wife and kid so well because the kid (Andrew) didn't appear on the scene until I went away for college and Nancy (wife) always made me nervous because she seems so proper. ANYWAY, I'm sure you are just dying to hear more about my family dynamics, but I'm not going to tell you anymore! Phillip gave me my own room AND my own guest cell phone while I was there!

Day Four: Sledding and board games with Andrew et al. Sushi for dinner! Hot Chocolate "tea" party!

Day Five: I have a slew of friends in Ann Arbor. Some of you know why. I'm not going to get into specifics so as not to give away too much personal info. Anyway, I got together with some of those people. Dirt is one of those people. Dirt is actually one of my favorite people EVER. He is intelligent, nice, positively hillarious, crafty (as in he can build/make ANYTHING), a master chef, a star photographer, a boy genius, and he's SUPER SUPER cute. Pumpkinfucker used to be jealous of him. A few years ago, he caused me a major identity crisis. You see, he is everything I've ever said I wanted in a man - he is perfect by my book standards. However, I am 100% not attracted to him in "that" way. After I realized that, I was convinced for a while that I HAD to be a lesbian. I was wrong about the lesbian part, but I still don't know why I've never wanted that boy. I've certainly wanted to want him, though.

Anyway, the point is that we hung out on Day Five pretty much all day. I got to see the house that he and Erika bought (he's seeing someone now - one of the AA crew - Erika is good for him. She's also practically famous in her own right, but I can't tell you how unless you email me and ask - again, too much personal info). We toured the town, went grocery shopping, made lasagna (I was the official spinach stemmer/rinser), had lots of the AA crew over for dinner, played Scrabble and Anagrams - SO MUCH FUN. I'm such a Scrabble fiend. Erika won - only barely - it was a very close game. Also, Erika had a double lined handmade leopard print Scrabble tile bag (with a fancy cord and all) that her friend made her for her birthday. I was duly jealous. We also watched "Rejected" which is the most hilarious cartoon ever made.

Day Six: Lunch with Dug, a friend from high school. Actually, we weren't really close friends or anything. In fact, had you told the 14 year old high school me that one day, in the future, I'd be having lunch with Dug, I'd have squealed like the teeny bopper I was and told you that you were shitting me. Actually, when I was 14, I don't think I said "shit" very often, but you get the idea. I remember the first time I ever saw Dug. He was hanging posters for the Literary Magazine club on the first week of High School. I decleared then and there that he was the cutest boy who ever existed and I joined the literary magazine. I eventually became the editor of said magazine, but Dug, alas, did not belong to the club. I spent the following three years of high school honing my interests so that one day I might be able to talk to Dug. I joined choir and went to Disneyland with the choir group and went to Epcot instead of Disneyland because Dug was going there. I joined the journalism class and became a photographer for the school newspaper (a skill I am ever so thankful for and that ended up being a very defining hobby for me - even still) in part because Dug was on the school paper. Anyway, Dirt is actually a friend of Dug's from college and Dug's the main reason I know all the people I know in Ann Arbor.

So I had lunch with the both of them. Indian food by the pound. Dug and I gossiped about High School folks. I tried to convince him to move to Seattle. He wants to move somewhere, though he's just unsure of where to go as of the moment. I become such a Seattle cheerleader sometimes. Now, is it me, or is the whole rain thing really not as bad as everyone makes it out to be? I really don't think it's THAT bad.

Games etc. that evening with Phillip and family. Andrew is quite the card shark. He is also insisting that he grow his hair into a mullet. He's 10, he doesn't know better.

Alright, so that's part one of the trip. I'm going to have to do this in parts or else I'm NEVER going to get it up here. Three more parts to come! Stay tuned! (please?)